Cushion

Think of where you are for so many of your family photos.  At home.  On the couch. Think of the primary, staple furniture piece when moving - aside from your bedroom set.  A couch.  Think of the comfiest, safest, coziest place in your home.  Typically, again, yes - a couch.

My parents had this what-seemed-like-a-formal couch growing up.  A very distinct, vibrant floral pattern.  With cranberry tones to match all the cranberry glass in the living room.  The floral pattern quilted around each flower.  But it was also comfortable and nap-able.  We could put our feet up and stretch out.  It’s still in my childhood home as I write this.  It’s so durable and has held up so well all these years.  

Another couch currently in my childhood home was more for decoration.  Off-white, accent pillows, no-feet-aloud type of couch.  Beautiful and classy, don’t get me wrong.  But you know the type. ;)

There’s hand-me-down couches too.  Alli and I had one at both our Eagan and Minneapolis apartments.  With a beige, trendy, swirl-patterned cover.  Even better yet … a couch cover. ;)

Johnnie and I purchased an affordable, dark brown, thin suede, sectional-type couch when we moved to River Drive.  It was more boomerang-shaped than sectional really but ended up just not being very feng shui for me.  We sold that via Facebook Marketplace for a tall-back, upright (more like uptight, lol) gray, tweed couch and loveseat … bought locally, which was important to us.  But it just didn’t mesh with us or allow for cozy movie nights or let us melt into it on rainy/snowy afternoons.  I think we’ve finally fallen into our favorite now. Bulky and over-sized (sitting all the way back, my feet don’t reach the floor .. lol); gray, tweed (wink, wink), nap-able, movie-watchable, feet-up ottoman, couch, and loveseat combo. 

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Getting places early, let alone on time, is one of my many faults.  The one I beat up myself the most about.  And the one thing I am always trying to get better at.  You know that automated phone message, ‘Please arrive 15 minutes before your scheduled appointment.” Yea, that’s for me.  I need to build in a better cushion (think couch) of time.  More like I just need a cushion because I don’t think I even have one to begin with.

That thought led me to think about a cushion monetary-wise.  I have retirement savings accounts, but how’s about not necessarily dwindling down each pay check, Steph.

The older I get, the more I realize that your identity is just a story you keep telling yourself.  “I’m not a morning person." “I’m not good with money."  These are stories. Not truths. Change the story. Watch the identity shift. You're not fixed. You're fluid.  Choose fluidity.  @scottdclary

We have a newly permitted driver in the house.  ‘Cushion’ metaphorically comes up often while driving with her.  Reminding her to keep a safe, respectful distance from the car in front whether driving or stopped at a red light; and also, planning ahead and anticipating reaction time.  Life basically, right?

‘Cushion’ also makes me think of protection.  Think of the forts you made with chairs and blankets and bed sheets and couch cushions as a child.  Think of the soft barrier the cushions provided.  A metaphor for life - gentle yet protective.  Think of your mind.  Your heart.  Your peace.  Bound.  Protected.  Cushioned.  Aware or not.  Reflective or not.  Purposeful or not.  You’re building it up around you.  It’s true.  Think about it.  Pinpoint it.  Bring it to the surface.  Identify it. What does this “cushion” look like for you?

Author Shauna Niequist in Present Over Perfect writes,  “You get to decide who you're going to disappoint, who you're going to say no to.  Picture your relationships like concentric circles: the inner circle is your spouse, your children, your very best friends. Then the next circle out is your extended family and good friends. Then people you know, but not well, colleagues, and so on, to the outer edge. Aim to disappoint the people at the center as rarely as possible. And then learn to be more and more comfortable with disappointing the people who lie at the edges of the circle - people you're not as close to, people who do not and should not require your unflagging dedication.”