Capacity

By Stephanie Linehan

A fellow teacher-colleague-friend, Carrie, introduced me to an online science curriculum called Mystery Science a solid handful of years ago and it forever changed my teaching.  It followed the Next Generation Science Standards and offered anchor phenomena to captivate students and lead them into wanting to learn more.  It was hands-on and simple to everyday life.  It significantly helped teachers when teaching got going so fast but we knew we wanted so much more for our students and just didn’t have the time to create.  It supplied directions, instructions, lessons, printable resources, videos, etc.  It was a supportive friend in the education world.  

In one particular experiment, we were learning about surface tension.   I displayed a clear glass on a stool at the front of the class.  Students quietly and gently gathered around.  Some sitting, some kneeling, some standing.  For perspective.  And gauging and watching.    Slowly filling up the glass of water.  Until we thought it was filled to the brim.  Slowly dropping pennies one at a time.  In a contest, sort-of-speak.  One by one.  More and more.  To witness this dome shape across the top of the glass.  A lot of checking at eye-level.  Nose to glass.  The water appears to take on so many more pennies than you would have ever guessed. 

Then, boom!  It spills over.  Limit reached.  Capacity met.  Maxed out.  Like life. You go and go and and go. You fill and fill and fill.  You give and give and give.  And then, boom.  Not necessarily a breaking point.   But a pretty defined moment of awareness or exhaustion.  It might look like throwing your hands up in the air exclaiming, ‘I just can’t.’ Or a quiet retreat or a withdrawal.  

You know how social media catches on to the posts you like, the reels you pause to watch, etc.?  Capacity-reaching, boundary-making sort of statements, quotes, affirmations, and revelations have been gracing my feed lately.

“Adulthood is saying, ‘But after this week things will slow down’ over and over until you die.” Funny, not funny.  

Cory Muscara writes, ‘Just because you CAN handle something doesn’t mean you SHOULD handle it. Capacity does not equal obligation.’  He goes on to assure, ‘Exhaustion can be a threshold.  Not a sign to push harder, but a portal into a truer life.’

49 is right around the corner for me.  The past few birthdays I have been posting a favorite, meaningful, intentional quote to represent life lately.  This year, it’s honestly, ‘Do less to do more.’  Covid certainly made me realize that.  Along with a career change and frankly, aging.  My capacity is a lot different sleep-wise and time-wise. But also physically and emotionally.  Why stretch myself or force more capacity?  Embrace it.  Go with it.  Honor it.  Less is more.  

I do want to fill up life, that glass of water, carefully and beautifully again.  It won’t be a contest or race or competition. But it will involve fewer ‘pennies.’  And it will be more carefully staged.  And intentional.  Cautious and protective, especially if I edge towards a spill over.  

I tend to retreat with love and nature.  Messaging with friends and loved ones, sending mail, creating & gifting little treats, curling up on the couch, reminiscing & looking through pictures, walking/hiking, and getting to the Kinni.  

In a recent trip to Montana, I literally and figuratively could not fill up on enough nature.  The abundance of fresh, mountain air,  sunshine, & water; the landscape, greenery, & trees; the peace, pace & serenity; the inhales, exhales, & deep breaths (perhaps some gasping for air, who’s to say? #lotsofhiking). Not to mention the loving company and immense gratitude.   No capacity was maxed there ;)

- 

In hard, traumatic, broken open times, tiny moments will swell into beauty. Angels in the form of people and animals will come in. Life will show you you're ok. - Victoria Erickson

You got a little crazy there for a while.  Come back to your center.  Slow it down a sec and breathe and just get rested and intentional.  Simplify.  Simplify.  Simplify. - Brendon Burchard 

you don’t need fixing

you need space -

wild, quiet, honest

where masks fall

breath slows

and the real you 

unedited and whole

can finally rise again.

• scott stillman books

More long walks. More good books. More music. More sunsets. More holding hands. More cuddles.  More road trips. More honouring your heart. More being nice to yourself. More laughter. More fun in the moment. More beach. More forest. More memories.  More of what brings peace to your life. More of what brings inspiration. More of what makes you feel loved and not alone.  Focus on that today. @butterfliesandpebbles

I hope you will go out and let stories, that is life, happen to you, and that you will work with these stories … water them with your blood and tears and laughter till they bloom, till you yourself burst into bloom. - Clarissa Pinkola Estes

Stay close to people who want more for you, not from you. - Unknown